


Evolution

by Aosoth



Category: Insatiable (TV 2018)
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Bisexuality, Emotional Porn, Emotional Sex, Gay Male Character, Kissing, Love Confessions, M/M, Oral Sex, Sex, Sexual Confusion
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-29
Updated: 2019-07-29
Packaged: 2020-07-25 19:47:29
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,805
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20031352
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aosoth/pseuds/Aosoth
Summary: A story about what happened between the Bob's first night together up until Patties birthday roast.No less than two sex scenes but also a lot of imagining on what went on in Bob Armstrong's head and how he struggled with his emotions.It also hints on how differently things could have gone if Patty had not outed Bob Armstrong before he was ready.





	1. Chapter 1

That night when Bob had gone to Barnard’s house, he had been sure of what he wanted. He had finally permitted himself to think those very forbidden thoughts – that he might be bisexual, and that he did, indeed, feel something for Barnard. As soon as that happened, he had gone straight to his house, practically jumped into his arms and kissed him passionately. Nothing had ever felt so good, so _right, _in his entire life. This was not without surprise; He _was_ cheating after all, on what he had always thought to be the love of his life. With a _man_ who he had despised ever since he had ended their friendship no less. But in that moment, none of that mattered. His heart was full of not only desire, but of love, for Barnard and he could not have stopped himself even if he had wanted to. He had this strange sense that this was exactly where he was supposed to be.

He had pushed Barnard down unto the sofa and they started to undress each other. His mouth never leaving Barnard’s until his shirt was completely unbuttoned. Then Bob made his way down, kissing and caressing his neck, his chest, his belly, all while working impatiently with his jeans. The very second that Barnards hard cock was out, it was in Bobs mouth. They both moaned with pleasure as Bob worked on his cock skilfully, making Barnard wonder if this was _really_ Bobs first time with a man. There was not much time for those thoughts though, as Barnard soon could feel an orgasm threatening to end this much quicker than he wished. He had grabbed Bobs head and pushed it away, while telling him with a breathless voice:

-Stop, please stop or I’m going to cum right in your mouth!

Bob had looked up and smiled at him.

-Well, let’s save that for a little later.

Barnard smiled, eyes beaming with happiness and wonder at what was happening. He pulled Bob up, removing the few pieces of clothing that he still had on. He had always loved giving blowjobs and he could not wait to do that to Bob – Oh, how often he had fantasized about doing just that to this sweet, sexy man! While he did, he would keep eye contact with Bob who gazed back, looking just as happy and bewildered as he felt. There, on his sofa, they were lying naked, both equally engaged in each other yet he could hardly believe that this was actually happening. But it was happening. And then, they made love.

Bob, who was on his back, spread his legs for Barnard. Surprisingly, he was not the slightest nervous that it might hurt, seeing as he had never been penetrated before. He didn’t feel tense at all and just wanted Barnard inside him. Barnard, taking Bob’s leg-spreading as an invitation and careful to not hurt him, spent some time caressing the outside of Bob’s ass with his cock which was well lubricated with spit, warming him up. This caused little whimpers of pleasure and anticipation from Bob. As the tip of Barnards cock entered his ass, Bob cried out.

-You ok? Barnard whispered gently, pausing to check of Bob really wanted to proceed.

-Yes! Take me Bob! He pleaded.

Barnard proceeded to slowly push into Bob’s behind, letting out deep moans which entwined perfectly with Bob’s more high-pitched ones. Their lips hardly ever separated while they fucked except for a few seconds of kisses and nibbles on the others neck, face and chest now and then; causing the other to promptly pull the other one’s lips back to theirs. After a short while Barnard increased the speed of his thrusts, then increased it again but were weary of not going too fast. None of them wanted this moment to end yet at the same time they were both so insanely horny that the need to come were almost impossible to resist. Especially for Barnard who had longed for this for literally 25 years. Therefore, soon they both came in an intense mutual orgasm, all that sexual tension finally released. Afterwards they just lied silently in each other’s arms for a few minutes, catching their breaths and revering in what had just happened. Not many words were exchanged between them; they were not needed. They just cuddled until they felt ready for another round. The mouth shot Bob had wanted to save for later did indeed happen.

Yes, Bob had been very confident and sure of himself that night. Now, since the morning after, not so much. Had he been single, openly bi or gay, maybe just been married for a shorter time, or younger and less settled, he might have embraced his feelings right away. But he wasn’t out, or single and his life had become way more complicated because if it. For Christ’s sake, he was married since over 20 years to what he had always thought to be his soulmate, he had children that would most likely not like to see their parents divorced and, well… he was straight as far as everyone he knew was aware of.

That night, it had all been about exploring his suspected newfound bisexuality, to see if he could really go through with sleeping with a man. Not thinking about the consequences. He never believed that he would love it as much as he did; he certainly did not think that he would feel so _at home_ being with Barnard. Like some silly fairy tale were the prince and…well, the other prince, knew they were meant to be.However now, in the light of day, he found himself trying to convince himself that this was _at most_ a crush. One that would burn out as fast as it started, and he would be able to continue with his life as if nothing had happened afterwards. It just _had_ to be that way.

It had to because all this could mean a completely new life for him. Possibly, not a good one either… Coralee and Brick would hate him, perhaps never even speak to him again. He could lose friends over this. He would probably lose his father and at the same time, his job. Maybe he would regret it all after a while, without being able to get any of it back. It really wasn’t as simple as just embracing his feelings and walk into the sunset hand in hand with Barnard to live happily ever after, because that might come at a much too high a price.

The same went for Barnard he guessed. He must have had a lot to lose, even as a teen. What other reason would there be for him to not have come out before getting together with Etta May and thus starting this whole charade of his? What was it he had said - “I needed things to look a certain way”? His ambitions regarding politics certainly required a traditional lifestyle. Maybe there had been other reasons for it as well. For all Bob knew Barnard’s friends and family might not have taken kindly to his homosexuality, leaving him completely alone if he _were_ to come out. What reason would he have had to come out and be abandoned, having no chance at his dream career and _still_ not have the one he loved so deeply anyway if that was the case?

When Barnard confessed to him, Bob had thought that he was an asshole for lying to his wife throughout their entire marriage. Now he felt a strong sympathy for Barnard and how he must have felt all these years. Trapped in a life he had built for himself, desperately trying to live a normal life with some semblance of happiness in it. Trying to fill the void of not having _him_ in his life. Maybe he had really hoped to, and tried to love Etta Mae like a husband should, so that it wouldn’t have had to be a complete fraud on his part? For every year that went it must have become even harder for him to leave all that he had built up.

No, Bob understood him all too well now. They would have each other, sure, but what about everything else? Would it really be worth it? The questions and worries were many but try as he might, he _wanted_ to walk into the sunset with Barnard. But still, possible heart ache from leaving Barnard aside, choosing Coralee would be the easy, safe way out of this dilemma.


	2. Chapter 2

It had been a few weeks since their first night together and in attempt to avoid having to eventually leave Coralee, Bob had indeed tried hard to tell himself how this was totally nothing serious. Just a little lustful fun on the side. Ignoring the love that he felt. Barnard’s behaviour did nothing to aid him in this though. After their conversation the morning after when Bob had admitted how he felt, Barnard had become so sweet. He was no way near as pushy as he had been in Bobs office after the first kiss. Barnard had understood Bob’s confusion and while he certainly wasn’t about to give up on Bob now, he did not want to push him too hard. 

Barnard had become a perfect gentleman, courting Bob with romantic picnics in his office, greeting him with gentle kisses on his hand; giving him a loving smile and a wink whenever their gazes met and gave little discreet caresses on his arm as he passed Bob in the corridors at the office. More than a few times they had sneaked into one of their offices for a make out session. No sex, except for a little grinding of hard-ons while they kissed. They both certainly wanted to tear each other’s clothes off again. Barnard had however decided to show Bob that he had nothing but honest intentions. If Bob needed to take it slowly, Barnard would respect that and they would do so. He wanted Bob to know that if he were only to stop holding back, Barnard would be there to love him with his whole heart. That Bob would be safe with him even if the world decided to treat him cruelly, were they to make this official. Bob, in turn, actually enjoyed the slow pace. 

The gentle approach worked. The ruthless, self-absorbed asshole Bob had always thought Barnard to be had vanished. Bob got to see the real Barnard, a loving, caring and supporting man who wanted nothing but to love him. Someone who he could see himself in a relationship with. They had great chemistry. When they weren’t kissing they could just sit and talk for a bit about everything and nothing. Like pageants. Bob’s passion which Coralee had never really supported. Barnard however, didn’t have a single critical thing to say about his interest, even hinting at being ok to have Bob quit his lawyer job to pursue coaching full time if they were a couple.

For every day of gentle, loving gestures, his love got harder to deny. They also fueled his desperation to hold on to Coralee and their safe, well-known lives. Now, Bob wasn't stupid. Deep inside he knew who he would eventually choose. He just fought it because he was scared. That was why he clinged to the idea of this being about sex only.  
But he enjoyed the kissing-only rule that Barnard seemed to have put up(he hadn’t actually told Bob his intentions to take it easy with him, and Bob in turn did not have the guts to make any moves like he had the first time). Had it been purely about sex, he would probably have been extremely frustrated by the lack of hard core action. He wasn’t.

He also daydreamed about doing the typical couple-things; Cuddling in the sofa watching a movie, going on weekend getaways, having dinner parties with friends, falling asleep next to each other at night and sleepily having breakfast together on a workday. That too clashed with the empty lust-narrative he was trying to stick to. One time he even caught himself daydreaming about their wedding day, feeling all happy and expectant as if that was actually something planned. Not exactly something one does with a mere fuck buddy (or in this case, non-fuck buddy) and Bob off course, knew that. And after weeks of inner conflict, which all grew weaker as time went, he had one last, faint fight with himself. Then he finally surrendered.


	3. Chapter 3

Barnard had come out to Magnolia and was going to tell Etta May. They were going to get a divorce and he would soon be free to be together with Bob for real. Deep inside, Bob was happy and excited by this. However, that was overshadowed by the same old panic about doing away with his marriage and possibly more. But he was in love. Like, crazy in love. He simply could not wait for his feelings to go away anymore, nor could he leave Barnard behind. Bob would leave Coralee. He just wasn't ready to do so yet. Imagining all the backlash he could get made him terrified. Now it wasn't just some illusive "what if", but since his decision, an actual possible threat. He felt just like a person who’d decided to jump from the highest trampoline in a swimming pool. It all seemed easy enough from the safe ground but felt like jumping from the tenth floor while actually up on it. And so, the closer he came to choosing Barnard, _really_ choose him, the more he panicked.

It was the night of Patty’s birthday roast and Bob felt like his stomach would tear itself open from nerves. Barnard had practically dragged him up to the bedroom in attempt to calm him down. He gave Bob a little massage and as he had started to become slightly more relaxed, Barnard started to gently kiss his neck. He turned the chair Bob was sitting on around and they started kissing. Bob savored the sweet taste of the man he now loved, wanting so bad to be with him and only him. Being in Barnard’s arms made him feel safe, and being afraid and conflicted was getting really old. Barnard, on the other hand, knowing that a nice big orgasm would help with Bob's tension, figured it could not hurt after all this time. Bob had really warmed up to him and it seemed he had gotten the message of his unconditional love. Not to mention that the bulge in Bob's trousers every time they made out had been a clear indicator of that he, at least, weren't unsure about the physical part of all this. Barnard pulled his mouth away from Bob’s, smiling:

-I know something that will help you relax. Lie down.

Barnard pointed to the bed. Bob obeyed and Barnard locked the door and laid himself on top of him. They started making out again. Bob could not help himself from moaning with excitement. They had not been alone like this since their first night together. They were both hard and Barnard rubbed his crotch against Bob’s who responded by thrusting his hips up toward Barnard’s, making it clear to him what he wanted. When Barnard started unbuttoning Bob’s shirt though, he hesitated.

-What, not here! He continued, whispering:

-With all the people downstairs…

Barnard took Bob’s face between his hands and gave him a gentle kiss. He said in a low voice, reassuring him:

-Yes, they’re downstairs, we are up here and the door is locked.  
He paused and smiled lovingly, yet mischievously, at Bob. He continued:

-We just need to be a little quieter than last time.

Bob didn’t protest again. All this holding back on sex had taken its toll on them both and none of them could resist any more. They quickly got naked and Barnard took his sweet time giving oral sex to Bob. He sucked, licked, kissed and stroked his penis and balls while gently fingering his ass with two fingers. Bob fought to not make too much noise, but man was it hard! Barnard was an absolute god in bed and Bob felt like he was constantly on the verge of coming. Every time Bobs breaths and moans got faster and higher, indicating that he was getting really close, Barnard would stop what he was doing and continue a few seconds later. Not being allowed to come was torture, but it was the sweetest torture. He wished they could do this forever. There, on the bed, it was as if they were in their own little world were nothing on the outside meant anything, could not get to them and only the two of them mattered. Finally, again, Barnard laid on top of Bob and they continued kissing.

-Make love to me Bob! I need you to make love to me, it’s been too long, I need you inside me… Bob rambled, drunk with desire and not caring much about the people downstairs anymore.

Off course, Barnard did. Just like their first time, he gently penetrated Bob’s ass. When his whole cock was in, he paused for a moment and then started thrusting slowly. Bob squirmed with delight under Barnard, urging him to do it faster. Barnard would only increase the pace a little though, tenderly making love to Bob and intending to give him as much pleasure he could for as long as he possibly could. Just like Bob, Barnard struggled with keeping his moans and groans down. 

As they lied there, finally giving in to their lust for each other again, other emotions came spilling out as well. Just like Barnard had been unable to stop telling Bob that he loved him right after their first kiss, he could not stop himself now. Not being a man to show weakness, he had hidden it well, but he had been absolutely terrified of losing Bob now that he had finally gotten to experience what it was like to have him. Now laying in the arms of the man he had loved for over two decades his desperation made its way through his calm and secure persona. He so wanted to make Bob understand how loved and safe and sound he would be with him. To make Bob choose him so that he would never have to be without him again. Through his laboured breathing he declared his love for Bob in half whisperers:

-I love you so much Bob, all I ever wanted… needed, was you. All I’ve ever done was to dull the pain of not having you with me. I’m so sorry for leaving and hurting you, I… I was hurting too because I never thought I had a chance. 

Barnard, thinking about Bob’s hesitations, buried his face in Bob’s neck and continued:

-Don’t be scared of this, honey, please… just please be mine… 

Barnard’s voice trembled. Bob, moved by the vulnerability in Barnard's voice as he said this, interrupted him, whispering back:

-I love you too, Bob. I love you. I’m yours.

Barnard laughed faintly at this, hardly believing what he had just heard. He stopped thrusting for a little while, just showering Bob with kisses, eyes watering, almost shedding a few happy tears.  
They then kept going, both smiling happily at each other between kisses; Silently agreeing that they were now boyfriends. Then finally Barnard decided that he could not hold back anymore. He started going faster as well as stimulating Bob’s cock to his absolute delight, now working on bringing him to climax. Right before Bob came, he gave out cries that were a little too load for comfort and Barnard put his hand over Bob’s mouth. While doing this, he caressed his cheek with his thumb and gave him that drop-dead gorgeous smile of his, silently communicating to Bob that he knew how hard it was to keep quiet. As Bob came he gasped and curled his back with pleasure. Then he relaxed, trying to catch his breath. Barnard pulled out and started jerking off, biting his lip while doing so. Bob, completely spent, stared mesmerized at Barnard. His naked, well-shaped body, heaving with laboured breathing, pleasuring himself and staring down at Bob was a most amazing sight.

-I want you to come all over me, babe. 

Those words pushed Barnard over the edge, and he sprayed warm cum over Bob’s tummy and chest, mixing with his own. Now having Bob’s hand over his mouth.

As Bob laid all relaxed and carefree in Barnard's arms, he thought about what Barnard had said about him leaving and hurting him. It made him think back to the time before they became enemies.  
Maybe, just maybe he had loved Barnard for just as long as he had loved him. It kind of made sense; All this time that they had…dated, or whatever you would call it, Bob had felt like he had found a long lost love. Maybe back then he had been too young to fully understand his emotions, confusing them for strong friendship rather than romantic love. Or the strong friendship had turned to love, its lines too fine to detect. Either way, it had hurt so bad when Barnard turned away from him without any explanation, and he had gone for a “well if you don’t like me, I’m not going to like you either!” kind of coping mechanism. Bob had not wanted to linger on any feelings that would have caused him pain.  
However, the tender emotions, repressed as they were, had hinted at their existence, in the names he had given to Barnard. In his unwillingness to look at Barnard’s naked torso every time he took off his shirt in front of him. Why he had felt so uncomfortable seeing him with Etta May. Why he had found it so hard to say “I don’t” that day in the bathroom. Because little flashes of love, possibly really old ones, had tried to make themselves known. 

And those sneaky make out sessions… It had felt like being a teenager in his very first relationship again, with just hugging and kissing and the feeling that none of them really dared taking it a step further. It was as if they had started over, reliving their teen years as it might have been had Barnard not turned away from him then. And suddenly it all fell into place.  
He was going to be with Barnard, come what may. He just needed a little more time to gather courage. He was still a little too scared to let the world know. But as long as Barnard would be patient with him for just a little while more, he would take that big, scary step.


End file.
